Conflict Intake: Good Questions & Structure Matter

By Kim Faithcloth, PhD and Dawn Bedlivy, Esq.

Effective conflict resolution begins with a well-structured intake process. The HERE approach-Honor the relationship, Explore the story, Reflect, and Enable/Empower-provides a framework for HR leaders to navigate initial conflict conversations efficiently and impactfully.

Key Elements of Effective Conflict Intake

Questioning Techniques

  1. Open-ended questions. Encourage elaboration on thoughts and feelings.  For example:
  • How do you feel about the situation?
  • What are your concerns?
  • Can you tell me a little more about what happened?
  1. Clarifying questions. Further understanding and avoid misunderstandings.  For instance:
  • When you say [restate it briefly], can you provide me a bit more detail?
  • Can you give me an example?
  • I want to make sure I understand a bit more. From your point of view, are you saying . . . ?
  1. Reflective questions. Promote self-reflection and perceived empathy. Examples include:
  • How do you think [what happened] impacted the other person?
  • How do you think each option aligns with your values and goals?
  1. Evaluative questions. Empower employees to take responsibility and find solutions.  Use these sparingly:
  • What are a few next steps from your perspective?
  • What support do you need to move forward?
  • What is your view of the business impact of this conflict?

Structuring the Intake Process

  1. Be present and non-investigatory.
  2. Use the HERE structured approach.
  3. Adapt questioning techniques to the personalities involved and resolution stage.
  4. Focus on effectiveness instead of efficiency.

By implementing these strategies, HR leaders can create a conflict intake process that is both thorough and efficient, setting the stage for successful resolution.

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State of Workplace Conflict in 2024: Insights and Solutions (Workplace Peace Institute, April 2024).
State of Workplace Conflict in 2024: Insights and Solutions (Workplace Peace Institute, April 2024).